55 | Learning to Celebrate Yourself

Feb 14

55 | Learning to Celebrate Yourself

It's time to celebrate, y'all! This episode marks the one-year anniversary of A Pleasant Solution: Embracing An Organized Life podcast! Join me in reflecting on the excitement, nerves, and unique perspectives that have influenced this journey.

In this milestone episode, I'm diving into two things: first, a heartfelt thank you to all of you incredible listeners who've listened and shared, and second, I’m talking about learning to celebrate yourself. Honestly, as an adult, it’s not easy. So, let’s talk about honoring wins of all sizes, learning to allow others to celebrate you, and actively encouraging others to celebrate themselves.

Plus, as a token of gratitude, I’m giving away prizes all February 2024 – details are listed below under mentioned.

Thank you for a phenomenal year. I’m grateful for each one of you, and here's to celebrating the collective greatness of this community.

MENTIONED:

A Pleasant Solution® is giving away:

Five (5) $50 Amazon gift cards and Three (3) 45 min. Clutter Coaching Sessions. Here’s how to enter:

Listen to at least one episode of A Pleasant Solution: Embracing an Organized Life.
Click 5 🌟 Stars and Leave a Review with your name/handle.
DM me a screenshot of your review.
Tag @‌apleasantsolution + share on your stories for bonus entries.

Giveaway ends on 02/28/24 at 11:59pm EST.

Void where prohibited. No purchase necessary. Not sponsored by or affiliated with Meta, Instagram, or Amazon.

Giveaway drawing will be 03/01/24 at 12pm EST.

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Intro: Welcome to A Pleasant Solution, Embracing An Organized Life. I'm your host, certified life coach, professional organizer, and home life expert, Amelia Pleasant Kennedy and I help folks permanently eliminate clutter in their homes and lives. On this podcast will go beyond the basics of home organization to talk about why a clutter-free mindset is essential to an aligned and sustainable lifestyle. If you're someone with a to-do list, if you're managing a household and if you're caring for others, this podcast is for you. Let's dive in.
Amelia: Welcome to Episode 55, “Learning to Celebrate Yourself.” Y’all!!! It’s the one-year anniversary of this podcast! Ok, so, I remember trying to picture this moment – the one-year anniversary – back on launch day. Envisioning this moment was one technique I used to pump myself up. I was so excited: excited for those first three episodes, nervous knowing that I was taking a risk, and a little giddy because I knew my unique perspective was going to influence at least one listener per episode. So, I want to offer to you, picturing the future – the future where you’ve chosen to do something difficult, made it through the bumpy start, made it around the various learning curves – the future that’s turned out alright is a great strategy to get you through those initial scary moments of trying something new.

Before we dive into today’s topic, I want to say a special thank you to my podcast manager, Collet McKenzie. She helped design and launch this podcast, and she acts as my invisible accountability partner each week. Plus, she does all of the sound editing to ensure the best quality audio comes through. It’s important to me to make her invisible work visible to each of you, so please give her a quick smile wherever you might be right now.

Next, I want to say a special thank you to you! Whether this is your first episode or whether you’ve been alongside me this entire past year, I’m grateful for you. I’m a podcast listener, and now that I’m on the other side of the process, I appreciate and value listenership so much more. I know that you’re choosing to be here, and I don’t take that for granted. So, for the remainder of February 2024, I’ll be giving away prizes as a thank you for listening and a thank you for writing a review, so be sure to listen until the end of this episode or click through to the show notes for all the details.

Alright. Remember when you were little, and you had a birthday party, received a certificate or a trophy, or just had a moment when all the eyes were on you? How did that moment feel to you? A little embarrassing? A little like fireworks were moving through you? Perhaps your cheeks flushed a bit; or you had the biggest smile on your face that couldn’t be contained. When we were young, there were fewer inner judgments grading our abilities on a scale. There were fewer moments of comparison with others. There was just you, shining bright for a single moment.

Yet, as we mature into teenagers, then start off on life’s path, celebrating ourselves becomes harder. We hear the voices of others more loudly. We see what others are doing and measure ourselves against a race we’re not even competing in. Self-doubt grows. As women, we find ourselves turning our attention outwards towards others. Birthdays end up seeming like the only socially acceptable time to celebrate ourselves.

So, in today’s episode, I’m going to invite you to celebrate yourself. There’s no trick, no formula, no mindset magic. There’s simply the decision to do so. Celebrations are one way to mark time passing. Yet, when we focus solely on the major life milestones: big birthdays, anniversaries, moves, job promotions, we miss out on so many opportunities to honor the beauty of the everyday moments of life. There’s no destination that you and I will reach where someone will acknowledge all the late nights caring for sick loved ones. There’s no awards ceremony where someone will say, “Hey, that thing you did was really tremendous and thoughtful.” Waiting for another person to see how you’ve cut back your sugar intake, gone for a walk for half of the days last month, decluttered your linen closet, or made it through six weeks of physical therapy rehab… Well honestly, you deserve more. You deserve to be celebrated, and the truth is, you’re the one who’ll need to do the celebrating.

As always, I’ll encourage you to take a moment of awareness first. What’s your biggest obstacle to celebrating yourself? Think back to messages you may have received as a young person. Perhaps folks told you not to boast. There may have been an implied scale about what’s an ‘acceptable amount’ of self-promotion. Perhaps you heard lots of family members or friends gossip about another person “showing off” or being “self-centered.” Culturally, you may have been encouraged not to stand out for fear of being harassed or past traumas of drawing too much attention to the family. These elements matter, and they may influence how you naturally shy away from celebrating yourself today.

These obstacles are worth exploring – through journaling, meditation, or conversations with others. Getting curious about what you were taught and if those lessons still feel appropriate today, is purposeful work. As an adult, you are now free to decide what makes sense for your life, and it’s my opinion that it would be healthy to celebrate ourselves a little more. Life is too short and it’s often challenging, therefore adding an additional dose of goodness seems absolutely appropriate.

So, takeaway number one for today is give yourself permission to validate yourself. You’re amazing. You’ve been through lots in your life to get to this very moment in time. You may be going through it right now. Validating your efforts – your existence and your resilience – for goodness sakes, is a beautiful first step. For the last year, I’ve written a weekly newsletter sharing stories with those on my email list. I’ve shown up on this podcast each week. I’ve kept my children alive and my marriage intact, despite living in two different cities for the last year. I’ve navigated the emotions of long-distance parenting and marriage and caring for a mother who’s living with dementia. It’s often a lot, and I don’t give myself enough credit for it… so I’m giving myself credit right here and now with you. Thank you for being a witness.

Now, this is a tiny example of how to validate your own greatness. You’re on your own path. The greatness I’ve shared – my greatness – it doesn’t in any way, shape, or form diminish your greatness. Comparing suffering isn’t helpful. Comparing accomplishments isn’t helpful. Not one of us comes from the same background, has the same opportunities, or has the same resources. You’re tremendous and worthy because you’re here. You’re alive. So, look for what’s working right now in your life and acknowledge your role in making that happen. Even if you contributed 1% towards it. There’s no scale. You don’t have to have a 50% or more stake in something to own your contributions. If you’ve added some measure of support – through time, energy, money, love, attention – you can celebrate it. Even more so if it was your idea in the first place!

Learning to celebrate yourself can feel awkward at first. You may be out of practice. Take a listen into your body and see what emotional responses or sensations come up for you when you think about something delightful. I do want to pause here and explicitly state that validating yourself isn’t only about validating your efforts. (I see you, perfectionists and productivity queens.) Start by validating your being. Your breath. Your presence. Your physical body. Your spirit. Learning to celebrate yourself isn’t solely about what you’ve done or accomplished. It’s about acknowledging who you are. Let’s practice normalizing the emotions that come up when you tune into the fact that you are a light, just as you are right at this moment.

Which brings me to takeaway number two: allowing others to celebrate you. I’m here celebrating you right now. Every week I drip into your ear that you’re more organized than you think. It’s 100% true. I know it. I can see it in you, even if you can’t yet see it in yourself. It’s one of my favorite parts of connecting with folks, highlighting for them ways that they’re organized that have gone unnoticed. It’s such a pleasure for me. You have a number of qualities that are special about you, and I invite you to consider your automatic response to compliments. Is your default tendency to deflect? To blush? To counteroffer by subtly highlighting how XYZ isn’t really that big of a deal?

Learning to celebrate yourself involves accepting and receiving the praise of others. As I mentioned at the top of the episode, think back to when you were young and didn’t have the emotional defenses you have today. Or if that’s tough to imagine, picture a seven-year-old kid who’s just been told they won a prize for being the most improved athlete. That kid is soaking up every moment with pride.

The reason you may automatically deflect praise is because it’s often uncomfortable to be spotlighted. Your brain reacts as if you’re being separated from the crowd. It responds as if you’re suddenly vulnerable. Allowing the discomfort takes practice, and it starts by pausing the moment someone lifts you up. Take a slow breath. Smile. Say thank you. You can even follow up by saying, “I’m practicing receiving praise, so I’m going to savor this moment.” Every time you allow others to validate you, you’re acting as an example. It’s a way of modeling for others a moment of celebration. If you have young kids and they receive a compliment or praise, pause, and ask them how it feels before you direct them to say thank you. The more we can build a bridge between how something feels and our reaction, the more intentional the moment of celebration becomes.

So, to recap, give yourself permission to validate yourself and practice allowing others to celebrate you. Both of these practices will help you get to know yourself better. They’ll also serve as evidence for your brain of how truly brilliant you are. Don’t hesitate to keep a journal of compliments folks have given you or accomplishments you’ve made so that you have a concrete record of what’s working in your life. Recording wins of all sizes is one of the best strategies because it becomes a resource for you when life inevitably gets tough.

The last takeaway I want to offer today is to actively encourage others to celebrate themselves. Again, I don’t think we can have too many celebratory moments. You’re winning right now, I’m winning right now, and some folks are definitely going to win tomorrow. To be clear, this isn’t unfounded positivity. It’s generosity to self and others, one of A Pleasant Solution’s core values. Actively encouraging others to celebrate themselves will make you feel good. One easy way I like to encourage others to celebrate is by sharing folks’ content on social media or by writing a thoughtful comment. I see their success, so I share it. They then notice what I notice. You can complement a stranger. You can tell another mom that she’s doing a phenomenal job. You can actively praise your kids for their efforts or making a solid decision. You can always tell someone that you see them, hear them, and that they’re special. It doesn’t need to be complicated. It just needs to be explicit. Tell someone, “Hey, you should celebrate that you cooked three meals this week. That’s impressive.”

We’re often looking for valid reasons to celebrate ourselves and others but that’s nonsense. Any reason can be a valid one. There are no rules. So, within the next 24 hours, I want you to find a reason to celebrate yourself. Perhaps it’s something that happened 3 months ago. You can still celebrate it right here, right now. Perhaps it’s being the imperfect human you are. I’ve been podcasting for one year. That’s worth celebrating, and the more I say it, the more it sinks in. I’d love to hear what you’re celebrating too, so please reach out and let me know. Talk to y’all soon.

Outro: Don’t go! Leaving a review is quick and easy, and it keeps this podcast at the top of the charts. On your listening platform, click the 5-star rating. Head to Apple podcasts and add your feedback or share what you’d like to hear on future episodes. I'll then share your review on a future episode, and we’ll celebrate together! Talk to y'all soon and remember, you’re more organized than you think.