Say Yes to an Organized Life

Most of us desire a simplified, streamlined life. We want more time to spend as we choose. Yet, as we move from young adulthood into midlife, our lives become more complex: we own more items, we make more commitments, and we settle into routines of our own making. We begin to feel weighed down by the quantity of items we own and our weekly routines. But just as it’s possible to buy more and do more, it’s possible to let go and do less. Saying yes to an organized life is about setting the intention to open up your home and schedule in order to re-shape and re-align your lifestyle to one that gives you back your time and focus. 

Start with your vision of more time and more space. This differs for all of us. Your ideal of what “organized enough” looks and feels like will be different than mine, and that’s a beautiful thing.

When you think of being organized, do you envision less stuff and more space? Do you envision knowing exactly what you own and where it lives in your house? Do you envision owning only objects that make you happy and are meaningful?

Perhaps it has more to do with lightening your housekeeping responsibilities.  It may be a combination of the above.

As a professional organizer, it’s not my job to tell you what to keep or toss but to listen carefully to what means the most to you at this moment in your life and help you decide. It’s your job to say yes to the vision’s potential.

Take Emotional Responsibility  

Lightening your emotional load is essential to becoming organized. We all have objects that have been given to us or have been passed down by family members. You may have items that you associate with difficult times in your life or painful moments that you struggle to let go of. This is totally normal.

The first step in embracing an organized life is to explore these pain points so that you’re in a better position to heal and move forward. Emotions are the primary reason that we hold onto everything. We enjoy indulging in the memories and their related feelings.

Each object has a story and by acknowledging the influence of the story we’re telling ourselves, we become able to look at it more objectively.

Begin to ask yourself:

• What story am I telling myself about this object (or commitment)?

• How does the story I’m telling myself about this object make me feel? 

• Is this feeling adding to my life? Is this feeling closing me off in any way?

• Does it benefit me to continue to hold onto this object?

Decide how much space in your home that you want to dedicate to memory. Just because an object was passed down from a family member doesn’t mean it deserves space in your home.

Your relationship with your loved one continues whether or not you hold onto the plate, photograph, handwritten note, or item of clothing. Your loved one would prefer that you remember him or her fondly rather than feel weighed down by objects kept out of obligation. Say yes to this opportunity.

Rumbling with the emotional process is challenging and cathartic. We often tell ourselves that we “have to” keep something or that we “may need it” someday. These are examples of restrictive storytelling.

Obligation and emotional overwhelm cause us to stay stuck in our current holding pattern. By acknowledging that you have complete control and choice in what you surround yourself with (or commit to doing), you will begin to reclaim your power to create the time, space, and focus that you initially envisioned. 

Set Boundaries 

Setting boundaries around your time, your commitments, and the items you’ll allow in your home is a process that makes decision making easier. Initially, you may see it as restrictive, but by becoming clear about what’s most important to you, you’ll begin to see your true desires more readily. A boundary is an invisible demarcation that you establish to know what you’ll accept, how you’ll behave, and what enriches your life and home in the most positive way.

It doesn’t need to be communicated to extended family or friends unless you desire to do so. It’s meant to protect your personal time and energy so that you can focus most clearly on your values and priorities.

Begin to ask yourself:

• What are my current priorities and values?

• How can I ensure that the items in my home or commitments on my calendar align with these priorities?

• How can I act with grace, kindness, and love towards things that fall outside of those boundaries?

Decide your top five personal (and family) priorities. Write them down and commit to living your day to day within these categories. Use them as guidelines when accepting or declining an invitation, taking on an additional project, or when examining your self-talk about what to keep or let go of.

Organizing your priorities gives foundation and structure to your home and lifestyle. Say yes to what matters most to you.

You may also feel a lack of control around the objects that come into your home. To relieve stress, it’s best to decide in advance how you’ll behave.

For example, you may feel at the mercy of gifts given (from co-workers or family members, to your children). Remembering the adage that the “gift is in the giving” allows you to accept items graciously. Practicing gratitude for the person who took the time and energy to select a gift is essential.

You are not obligated to keep, wear, display, or find resonance with the gift itself, but instead can shift your focus to the person’s thoughtfulness. This creates a balance between respect for others and self-respect for your home.

Practice, Stumble, Repeat

Embracing an organized life is more than creating beautiful spaces within your home.

It’s about lightening your emotional burden, about surrounding yourself with objects that you love, use, and bring joy, and about creating clear guidelines for your energy and time. It’s a practice that will reap numerous benefits.

• You’ll learn to value what you decide to keep even more.

• You’ll feel less frustrated and overwhelmed and have less to clean and tidy.

• You’ll build confidence in your decision making by honoring your boundaries and commitments to self by knowing exactly why they exist.

Occasionally, you will stumble. You’ll look around and begin to judge how much you own. You may feel overworked or overcommitted. Know that when you slow down and take the time to make choices and re-set boundaries, your home and lifestyle will realign.

You’ll regain control and focus by reminding yourself that you’re responsible for what you own and what you do. Be kind to yourself, take a deep breath, and repeat the effort of saying yes to an organized life.

Let’s chat about your personal goals. Set up a free exploration call today!